Bacon Cheeseburger Pizza

...the American portraiture of gluttony.

Alright, I kid. Obesity is most definitely nothing to poke fun at. However, all it takes is a bit of daily physical activity - as simple as a half hour walk every morning, or more - and moderation of the foods you consume for you to be able to enjoy all those sinful sweets and savories.

But I am currently on vacation, and I've decided that my body will be on vacation too. No exercising, some [okay, a lot] of pigging out, and enjoying myself. Somewhat of a build-up to that big Thanksgiving dinner that's coming around the corner. Hey, if I'm going to be bad, I'm going to do it right.

I somehow managed to secure a little kitchen all to myself for most of the week. With limitless possibilities, I wanted to try a hand at making an actual meal, something that you could eat for dinner. Mind you, I don't think I've ever really "cooked" food before. Yeah, yeah, extremely shameful but I will admit to it. There's something about a fear of burning food on the stove top, or burning myself [I think an oil burn is scarier than an oven burn...], or serving people possibly undercooked meats that gives me extreme anxiety. I would feel HORRIBLE if my "cooking" gave someone food poisoning.

Fearful or not, I had to start some day. That day was today. And for my first official meal, the first thing that came to mind was PIZZA!

While trying to figure out what to make, I was reminded of the first time my roommate [RM] made pizza. I had just come home to our tiny studio apartment from a long day at school.

RM: Hey, there's pizza on the counter if you want some. I just made it.

ME: Ooo okay. Thanks! *om nom noming* Oh man, it's really good!

RM: Thanks! I made it from scratch. Wanted to see what yeast and rising dough was all about. But I couldn't wait for the dough to fully rise anymore, so you came home right on time.

Wait just a minute, so she's telling me here is that this was neither delivery nor DiGiorno??? Mind. Blown. It tasted way better than either. Props to my girl because she can still cook up a storm.

Oh but I didn't want just any plain ol' pepperoni pizza. I then remembered being told about the EPICness of a cheeseburger pizza, that such a thing existed. That was it. I couldn't think of anything better than that.

Bacon Cheeseburger Pizza

Adapted from BlogChef

Makes 8-12 slices

ingredients

1 pre-baked 12 inch pizza crust*

1/2 cup pizza sauce + 1/4 cup ketchup + 1/4 cup mustard

(you can vary the condiments amount to your taste preference, but about 1 cup sauce)

1/2 lb ground beef

6 bacon strips (cooked until crispy, then crumbled)

20 dill round pickle slices, or more to your preference

1 cup grated mozzarella cheese

1 cup grated cheddar cheese

1 cup shredded lettuce

2 roma tomatoes, chopped

* If you decide to make your own pizza crust, below is the recipe I used. Make the crust first before you start on the rest of the pizza.

Pizza Crust

From Allrecipes

ingredients

2 1/4 teaspoons active dry yeast

1/2 teaspoon light brown sugar

1 1/2 cups warm water

1 teaspoon salt

2 tablespoons olive oil

3 1/2 cups all-purpose flour

make pizza crust:

1. Dissolve the yeast and brown sugar in a large bowl. Let it sit for about 10 minutes.

2. Stir the salt & oil into the yeast solution. Mix in 2 1/2 cups of the flour.

3. Turn the dough out onto a clean, well-floured surface. Knead in more flour until dough is no longer sticky. If it's still sticky, add a bit more flour, about 1/2 a tablespoon at a time, while continually kneading.

4. Place the dough in a well-oiled bowl [I used the same mixing bowl. Fewer dishes to wash!] and cover with a cloth. Give the dough about 1 hour to rise to double its size.

5. Uncover the dough, punch it down, and then form a tight ball. Roll the dough out and use your desired pizza recipe (below!). Preheat oven to 425°F.

*notes*

• The yielded dough amount was actually too much for the 13-inch pizza pan I used. I would suggest you use about 2/3 of the dough for your pizza (12-13 inches), unless you like a super thick, deep dish-type crust. Or split it to make 2 pizzas. Or used the reserved 1/3 to make cheesy garlic bread. Yum!
• If you're baking the dough on a pizza stone, proceed to the pizza instructions and bake immediately.
• If you're baking the dough in a pan, lightly oil the pan, and give the dough about 15-20 minutes to rise before topping and baking.

   
make pizza:

1. In a medium skillet, cook the ground beef over medium heat until no longer pink. Drain grease and set aside.

2. Evenly spread the pizza-condiment sauce over the crust/dough. Top with the cheese, ground beef, bacon, and pickles.

bake:

Bake in oven at 425°F for about 10-15 minutes, or until crust is golden brown. Remove from oven and top with lettuce and tomato.

enjoy:

Make certain to pace yourself while relishing in the heinous decadency of your right-out-of-the-oven BACON cheeseburger pizza with a tall class of your favorite chilled drink.